What is neglect?

My three boys really love to eat strawberries, and we normally serve them whole on a plate with sugar to dip in. In the past, I have occasionally flirted with giving them a "party tray" to share, but this always ended in disaster. Fighting, kicking, screaming, bickering, wailing about an unjust distribution of fruit. So, wanting to avoid such discord, I normally just give them each their own individual plate.

But it occurred to me this morning that in so doing, I was failing my children for the worst of reasons. See, it's a real pain to actually deal with their selfishness. And instead of making yet another payment on the slow, frustrating mortgage of teaching them how to behave like decent people, I had been catering to their sinfulness by working around it just so my life would be easier. But society will not always indulge them this way.

Realizing this, I decided to give them a single plate and instruct them to share and take turns. Then I had to sit there and enforce their civility. They complied, and in the end this means they are now one lesson closer to being adults rather than just one missed opportunity closer to being the sort of people who need someone else to protect them from themselves.