Thought of the Day 07.17.08

This morning, my son wanted to draw on some paper while I was working, so I gave him the task of trying to copy the letters in his name. To my great surprise, he managed to do so for the first time ever, which was very exciting. After a few more tries, he asked to copy his last name. I gave him a new piece of paper and went to hang the other one on the refrigerator since it was such an important piece of Spencercana. But he said he wanted it back. He wanted to add to his masterpiece rather than preserving it, which of course meant that it might no longer merit preservation when he was finished.

So we fought, which was ironic since this began as a real achievement and fatherly pride, and I neared imposed my will upon him. But then he said something wonderful. “Daddy, this is frustrating me, will you please let me write on it?” Though I still wanted to preserve the paper, I wanted to reward his second big breakthrough of the day: describing his emotions rather than whining or complaining. So I gave it back to him, hugged him, and told him how proud I was of him for that.

And you know the funny thing? A few minutes later he beckoned me back into the kitchen to show me how he had hung the unimproved paper on the refrigerator door himself. It’s interesting what happens when we yield a little instead of forcing people to do things our way.