Thought of the Day 07.09.08

You say, “You never told me about that appointment.”
You should say, “I don’t remember you telling me about that appointment.”

You say, “I hate that you never do what I tell you.”
You should say, “I’m displeased that you’re not doing what I asked you to do a few minutes ago.”

You say, “That’s the dumbest idea you’ve ever had.”
You should say, “I’d like to understand your suggestion better. Can you explain it to me again?”

You say, “How come you’re never in the mood anymore?”
You should say, “I find you very arousing, and I’d like to be romantic more often. Is there anything I can do that will make you more interested in me that way?”

If you want to receive respect, give respect. If you want to be in control, allow for the possibility that you are responsible for the problem. And if you want to have a happier marriage, stop thinking that you can ever get there by vanquishing your spouse in personal combat. To fight is to lose, even if you win…especially if you win.