On loneliness.

Being separated from my family for six weeks while they were in St. Louis was extremely unpleasant for me. There were obviously some lifestyle benefits, such as time flexibility, significantly reduced responsibility, and a total lack of the aggravations which other humans (especially the partially grown ones) bring with them. But just as obviously, these advantages don’t even remotely outweigh the pain of being separated from the ones I love. One way I learned to deal with the separation was simply to not think about them too much, avoiding looking at pictures for the simple reason that it just hurt too much.

But as I endured this unpleasant experience, it also taught me something I wouldn’t otherwise have understood. Obviously, it made me consider those others who suffer much more prolonged separations under much harsher circumstances, such as members of the military and their families. But the not-so-obvious part for me was what it taught me about single people. Young singles tend to have lots of friends and live with roommates or their parents, so they tend to not be alone very much. But for so many older singles, loneliness is a way of life.

See, in my case, it was painful because I missed my family, but at least I knew it was only temporary. There was a wife and sons who were going to return soon, and then it would all be over. But for adults who live alone, no one is coming home…or at least no one is coming home anytime soon. The house may be quiet and no one will bother them, but this also means there’s no one to cry with, get hugs from, run an idea past, or just share a joke with on a moment-by-moment basis. And although I know I have already returned to the family life in which its easy to fantasize about being alone, I hope I will also keep a place in my awareness for the gift of companionship which all of our families have to offer the alone who surround us.