Foolish or Divine?

Have you ever gone out of your way to give an excellent Christmas gift to someone who didn’t appreciate it?

How did you react?

A perfectly normal way to handle this is to be irritated at the person for being such a jerk. But if that was your reaction, what did you do the next year? Did you give to that person again just as lavishly, a little less so, or not at all?

Well, here’s the ugly little secret. Gratitude is a form of payment. And if you refuse to give to the ungrateful, it’s because you care more about the payment than you do about the person. Think about it the other way around. When someone is lavishly grateful, it makes you want to give them more, right? But why? Because they are really paying off well. Is that generous, or is that just seeking a better return on your investment?

See, God is fascinating. He gives gifts to those who appreciate it and also to those who do not. And He keeps on giving gifts to both year after year. Although He enjoys the relationship crafted with the grateful, I think He enjoys the demonstration of His own goodness in that He keeps on giving unrequited love. In fact, He may even enjoy it more. The question is whether we will join Him in this awesome absurdity.

Special or specially protected?

The story of the first Passover in Exodus is truly an amazing one. As the final plague God sent against the Egyptians, the angel of death would go from house to house killing the firstborn wherever there wasn’t the blood of a lamb over the doorpost, the special protection given to the Jewish homes. But have you ever wondered why they needed it?

I mean the Jews had true religion. They were descended from Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, so their pedigree was right. They were God’s chosen people, the people of promise. They lived by the morality of their fathers. They were the weak, oppressed, and impoverished people suffering under an unjust government. And God had already levied nine plagues on their behalf against their enemies in His efforts to free them.

But none of this was enough.

If any of them had not put that lamb’s blood over their door, their oldest child would have died just as surely as any Egyptian’s did. Despite everything else in their favor, they still needed that lamb to avoid death.

When I grow up....

Imagine a son making the following statement about his father: “I love my dad. I admire my dad. He’s a great man, and I’m tremendously grateful to have had him in my life. However, I don’t want to be like him when I grow up.”

Say what?

We all know that kids want to be like their parents, and even before they choose this consciously, they do so automatically, imitating us in all sorts of ways. True, some sons eventually realize their fathers are deeply flawed and strive to not emulate them. But the normal scenario with a good dad is to want to be like him, both unconsciously and also intentionally.

So why is it that we all say we love God our Father, we admire Him, He’s great, and we’re tremendously glad to have Him in our lives, but then turn around and live as if we don’t believe a word of it?

The Holy Spirit has a simple message for us. “You’re Our children. You’re completely accepted by Us through Christ. Now it’s time to grow up and start acting like you’re a member of this Family.”

Who's the better parent?

“Daddy, give me more milk!”

Let me begin by saying that this is not the ideal way for my children to ask me to give them something they need. However, it’s not a particularly uncommon way. And it’s symptomatic of a general demeanor of ingratitude and being demanding. So the question arises, what should I do when they ask me for something this way?

Should I scold them? Should I physically punish them? Should I require them to ask properly? Or should I just get the milk for them?

In answering this question, I first and foremost think of how God deals with me. When I ask Him for something rudely, does He punish me? Does He scold me? Does He withhold His blessings until I ask in just the right way?

No. Of course not. God deals with me by giving me what I need (even most of what I ask for), and then gradually making me love Him so much that I want to ask more humbly. He’s very patient with me.

So, on any given day, I will either remind them how to ask properly and then give it to them or else simply do it, despite their rudeness and ingratitude. It pleases me to bless my children, even when they haven’t behaved properly. And I never want them to learn that a father’s love is part of some bargain they perform into.

Whose language are you speaking?

One of the most natural mistakes in persuasion is to offer the other person statements which you are personally fond of rather than those which will actually persuade him. Sometimes, of course, the two categories overlap, but so many times they really do not. This can be something as simple as presenting logic and evidence when what’s really needed is a good story.

In fact, this particular distinction (between reason and storytelling) is one that all too many modern conservative Christians have neglected. In trying to give people a solid theological foundation, we have tried to argue them into (first) the kingdom and (subsequently) holy living. So why doesn’t it work?

The reality is that humans respond to stories and are motivated by beauty much more powerfully than by logic. We can either whine about this fact or embrace it. For my own part, I recommend we follow the example of the Bible, a book which is itself primarily composed of stories rather than theological exposition.